Be The Best You
It’s so popular in our celebrity culture to say “I want to be like [insert name of well known successful person you admire]”.
Celebrity idolatry is at an all time high. Fortunately, over time many people have learned to recognise it for what it is, and to avoid it.
But there’s a subtle, much more significant issue at work too. That of ‘wanting to healthily model the person I admire’.
At it’s best this is healthy. In some ways to learn from and aspire to be more like others who have walked a similar path, can be a good thing. It’s important to look at others with similar gifts and callings, those we respect, and learn lessons from them.
But if we’re not careful, this can lead us down the path of essentially becoming copies of those we admire.
We can become so busy trying to become like someone else, that we forget to be ourselves.
And even worse, we can use our ‘trying to be like someone else’ as a way of avoiding being who we were made to be. Maybe even to cover up for a belief that we, in ourselves, on our own, don’t have value or legitimacy, and nor does our work.
And it’s a horrendous lie.
I had this realisation about my own life recently. I recognised whilst I have lots of heroes who I learn from, admire, and can take a lot of lessons and tips from, I actually have to recognise I’m not them.
I am me. And I am not anyone else.
I’m not the writer who writes words which are almost like poetry. But I’m also not the writer who writes 4 step guides, methodical, always practical pieces either.
I’m not a qualified theologian sharing academic insights.
I’m not one of the ‘platform building brigade’.
I’m not a business, lifestyle, food, or travel blogger.
I’m not the ‘everything meets all the grammatical rules’ writer.
I am me.
Just me.
And me is different from everyone else. My unique combination of gifts, my voice, is my own, and it’s valid, and it’s important. Even if no one ever reads my words, the important thing is to share them.
And the other thing I need to learn to receive, is the simple truth that my work is worth sharing. That I don’t and shouldn’t copy anyone else, and I shouldn’t be so ashamed of my own work, my own voice that I try to cover it up with someone else’s.
My love, my desire, is to share what I’m learning from my own story, and putting that into some practical ideas which can benefit everyone. My passion, my purpose, my calling, to help as many people as I can to discover their true identity, purpose and calling. To discover a deeper, interconnected spirituality. To embrace their creative side and give it full expression.
And it all begins by knowing that I am enough. I belong. I’m loved, accepted and wonderful just as I am.
This is true for every single one of us.
You are not like anyone else.
And who you are is beautiful.
When we truly receive this truth, it liberates us from fear of failure, and we no longer feel like we need to copy anyone else. Which frees us to create the life and do the work we were born to make.
Others have their paths, their callings, their talents, their style. I have mine. And mine is equally valid. It belongs. It’s enough. Of course, I will always be looking to nurture, develop, improve, mature the gifts which I have, to refine and improve them and myself. I will learn from those I admire.
But my style, my calling, my purpose is mine. And that’s OK
What You Have That Others Don’t
You have your own style. Your own purpose. Your own calling. And that’s OK. You don’t need to compare yourself with others – all it does is make you feel a failure, not good enough, and not as important. You feel your gifts, your voice even, isn’t valid.
But the thing is, you have one talent no one else has or ever will. You’re you. (you can tweet that)
You have a unique mix of personality, character, knowledge, wisdom, experiences and talents which no one else has or will ever have. The world needs the benefit of all of these qualities. And your responsibility – to yourself and the world – is to harness these in such a way which brings purpose and meaning to you, and brings something positive, constructive and beneficial to the rest of the world.
Even if the ‘rest of the world’ is just one or two people. That’s more than zero – and more than zero is enough to be worthwhile. Because I gurantee that at least one person will benefit from your work.
You.
Even if no one else in the 7 billion people in the world benefits from your work, there is no doubt the very act of doing the work will change you. It will help you grow. It will give you purpose, confidence and meaning. You will be different as a result – and that’s more than zero.
You matter. Your voice matters. Your gifts, experiences, knowledge, personality all matters.
I challenge you today, to have the courage to go and share it with the world.
Learn from others, yes. Admire others, yes. But don’t compare yourself to others, and don’t try to be anyone else.
Be you.
The world needs you – not a poor copy of someone else.
Are you with me?
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Question For Reflection:
What is it that makes you uniquely you?
Let me know in the comments below.
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Very encouraging blog. Thanks James.
You’re welcome Tara, really glad it encouraged you!
And the truth shall set you free. Great article, James, and one many people seem to miss – they are so busy trying to be like XYZ, they lose themselves. Unfortunately, it is often ingrained into us at an early age – Be like your older brother. Be like Mrs. Smith’s child. Then we grow up and want to be like XYZ. I was about 30 when I finally discovered me. I’ve been me for almost 40 yrs now and I like me.
As ever, great wisdom Bob, appreciate it. And thanks again for your encouragement, it makes such a difference. Thanks.
I don’t know how to be anyone else. I’m not that good at acting. 🙂 Thanks for reminding us to take a look at ourselves and be happy.
Thanks Dianne, really grateful for your support.
Beautiful encouragement here, James! One of the things I’ve always admired about you is your quest to be authentic to you own unique God-given calling as a writer. It’s a goal I share as my heart seeks to not become too distracted by how others are sharing their stories. We all have something individual, special and creative to share with our unique world-view. And that will look different on each one of us. I quite like not being too pigeon-holed as I write poetry, prose and prayers while I share the joys and challenges of my life and faith journey. Because deep down my main purpose is to point to Jesus and to help and encourage others along the way. I also totally agree with this:”the very act of doing the work will change you.” So, yes, I accept your challenge! 🙂
That’s SO awesome Joy – and thank you so much for this encouragement, I am so so grateful for it, and for your friendship. I completely agree with your comments about us all having something individual, special and creative to share – and yes, it must always, ultimately, point to Jesus. So glad you accept this challenge – let me know how it goes!!
I never understood the idea of wanting to be like XYZ person, but it did take me awhile to be truly comfortable in my own skin.
It’s a struggle I think many of us face Rebekah, for sure.
“Even if no one ever reads my words, the important thing is to share them.” Well said! I couldn’t agree with you more.
Very encouraging.
Thanks for sharing
Tiffany-
http://simplybeinggreat.net
You’re welcome Tiffany – really appreciate your encouragement.
This was just when I needed it. I love following your blog!
Thanks Liz – so glad it was helpful!!